Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Today my friend, tomorrow.............
I just found out today that a dear friend of mine I haven't seen in a couple of years died this past Saturday. For a third of my ministry we ministered in the same city, served on the same community volunteer emergency chaplaincy team. We probably enjoyed each other's company at least three times a month, going to conferences, meetings or just having lunch. I grieve for his wife of 41 years, and his three kids. The shocking email was received this morning; for a little over ten years we laughed, critiqued, served and ministered as brothers, and even a few years ago my wife and I visited him and his wife in Racine, Wisconsin. It was so enriching to have been blessed with a relationship that provided understanding because we were both in the same vocation that enabled us to discuss the holy and profane in the same conversation without feeling we were sacrilegious, harrassing each other at pastor's retreats in Illinois and Missouri, dropping in on each other and propping our feet on desks and getting down to business, and truly feeling each other's hurts and rejoicing unselfishly in each other's blessings. Those are relationships that are crafted in the soul, and neither time nor distance nor even ocassional disagreements can begin to erode ..... maybe that's why my friends death is exacting such a toll? Dave was only a year older than I am, I'm sure that fact has some bearing also.
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My sympathies for your loss. In many instances, losing a long-time friend, even if that person is geographically close, is more difficult than losing a family member. With friendship, there is no blood-imposed obligation to like somebody. Rather, the relationship exists because the parties believe it is worthwhile pursuing, which in turn ultimately to something completely opposite the zero-sum view of human interaction which most people have. That is, a selfless interest in and affection for the other without regard to what the other offers.
ReplyDeleteThanks Sherm!
ReplyDeleteSorry about your loss, Eutychus2. Hang in there and call if you need to talk.
ReplyDeleteThanks Sage. There were a group of 7 of us, within a 10 mi. radius that met together at least once a month, held united revivals and social events - we were all pretty close! It was considered a rather unusual ministerium; and it kinda sets you back abit when one member dies. One had already left ministry under a cloud.
ReplyDeleteagain, thanks.